How to Deal with Sex Addiction: a Complete Guide

I suggest two statements to start our guide with:

  • Sex addiction is a compulsive sexual behavior.
  • Sex addiction and / or pornophilia can be extremely harmful to a person and his surrounding and requires treatment.

Now, let’s see where it leads us…

sex and love addiction

What Is Sex Addiction?

So is sex addiction a disease? The American Psychiatric Association excluded the concept of “sex addiction” from the registry of diseases. This fact, however, does not at all interfere with the work of numerous rehabilitation centers, which continue to pump out money from celebrities and other hypochondriac but not poor people who have a diverse sex life.

That is, many physicians do not consider sex addiction a disease or a serious mental disorder and refer it more to a so-called lewd or deviant behavior. The attention of individuals and the society to this issue is declared to be a fashionable tendency. It's very convenient to behave as you want, and then declare your actions as a painful addiction.

A competent psychologist, however, should never make any moral assessments. The one should understand that a complex of such manifestations can be a part of other serious psychological problem. Is sex addiction real? Of course, there are scientists and psychologists who honestly consider addiction to a partner (male or female) a serious problem requiring specialist intervention. Anyway, even if sex and love addiction is not a disease, it still remains a problem for psychologists dealing with this addiction.

From the point of view of psychology, sexual addiction is a form of mental deviation, similar to a shopaholic syndrome or gluttony. The major symptoms are inability of a person to control his sexual impulses. Such people are bad at saying “no”, they are obsessed with compulsive ideas and thoughts about sex, they often display illegibility of choice. Perhaps, this way sexaholics are trying to get rid of the pressing everyday routine – they consider sex as a way to compensate for negative emotions by gaining pleasure.

The complex of other signs of sex addiction is standard and quite obvious: multiple sexual intercourses in various forms with different partners, including prostitutes; a deep, or even pathological, attraction to porn and virtual sex in various forms. In some cases (more complicated ones), the life of an addicted person becomes sex-centered - sexual thoughts, sexual statements, and sexual actions of the person begin to interfere with work, normal communication and relationships. Some experts compare such behavior with a withdrawal, when the addicted one has sex against his will and just to avoid depression.

According to statistics, sex addiction mostly affects men in their 40s. As a rule, these are people who are married or have a permanent partner (or several ones). It is not a surprise that such marriages are often destroyed precisely because of the multiple sex partners and unhealthy behavior when it comes to sex.

Sex addiction facts do not exclude women as potential victims. A woman can experience this problem, as well. Specialists say that in recent years, the number of women suffering from sex addiction has increased rapidly. The thing is that women cover their traces better and do not advertise their problems in public. Therefore, let’s consider what causes sex addiction and what the signs of sex addiction are.

signs of sex addiction Signs Of Sex Addiction In Men

Any addiction is significant to a person and leads to undesirable consequences. Alcoholism, drug addiction, smoking, gambling – these are most popular habits that require treatment, but not the only ones. Nowadays, a great number of men and women suffer from a disease called sex addiction. The symptoms of sex addiction include compulsive sexual behavior and uncontrolled desire for intimacy. Sexual addiction arises predominantly in young and middle aged men. Women are less likely to become addicts, but cases of significant hypersexuality among women happen, as well.

You may suspect presence of a deviation or rejection on a sexual ground in men, spotting the following sex addiction signs:

  • an increased sexual activity;
  • obsessive thoughts about sex;
  • multiple sex partners;
  • the tendency to frequent masturbation;
  • a high level of demand for regular sex;
  • the desire for violence and incest;
  • unnatural methods of satisfaction - paraphilia;
  • a strong passion for watching pornographic movies.

In addition to the signs of sex addiction, one should note that the basic need of sex addicts is sexual satisfaction. If intimate life does not give men the desired pleasure, then it affects their emotional state and efficiency soon. Sexual addiction leads to the development of depression and other mental disorders.

Hypersexual women are also characterized by compulsive sexual behavior, but its signs are less obvious. People who have this disease, as a rule, are not able to create a strong family, build a career and achieve something in life.

What causes sex addiction?

Sexual addiction in men develops under the influence of one or several factors. In particular, the etiology of this pathological condition gives us the following causes:

  • The rejection, humiliation and bad treatment of parents.
  • Lack of maternal care in childhood or her negative image.
  • The development of feelings of inferiority due to lack of parental love.

As you can see, all the reasons for the sexual addiction of men lie in the psychological trauma received at a young age. The same applies to women, who become obsessed with sex as a result of improper education and the formation of perfect image of males. If we talk about the mechanism of development of this pathological addiction, it is based on a neurochemical imbalance of serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine systems.

Overcoming Sex Addiction: Important Rules

So, how to overcome sex addiction? It is important to realize that sex addiction requires a medical correction, since it refers to serious deviations that entail grave consequences. The important thing here is to ask for professional sex addiction help. This obsession is a subject to treatment if you contact a qualified specialist and acknowledge the existence of a problem. Overcoming sex addiction and sexual obsession is real, but one must realize that such behavior is unacceptable and unhealthy. Here are some important rules and facts, which will help you realize the problem and consult with an expert on how to stop sex addiction:

People who suffer from sexual addiction experience a constant desire for sexual stimulation and satisfaction. They practice risky sexual behavior, for example, spend large sums of money (and time) on prostitutes or spend time on porn sites. Some are constantly looking for love affairs, masturbating, engaged in exhibitionism and so on. Despite the danger, they again and again return to this behavior and fail overcoming sex addiction unless they ask for a professional help.

how to stop sex addictionPeople who suffer from sexual addiction threaten their relationships, personal and social life, and their work. They also put their health at risk because of the threat of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV / AIDS.

People with sexual addiction spend a lot of time, energy and money on their addiction, losing interest in what was previously important to them, including a partner, children, friends, hobbies, careers or education.

People who suffer from sexual addiction experience a constant desire for sexual stimulation and satisfaction. They practice risky sexual behavior, for example, spend large sums of money (and time) on prostitutes or spend a lot of time on porn sites. Some are constantly looking for love affairs, masturbating, engaged in exhibitionism and so on.

People who suffer from sexual addiction experience personal transformation, they become quick-tempered, easily irritable, build a network of lies to hide their addiction, and this behavior moves them away from family and friends, leading to the feeling of isolation and loneliness, as well as a strong sense of shame and pain.

People who suffer from sexual addiction are completely absorbed by the thoughts about sex, and no matter how hard they try, their brain returns to them again and again. This is what defines this state as an addition. This is not an indicator of moral beliefs or weak willpower.

As in the case of alcohol or drugs addiction, sexual addiction causes a kind of “tolerance”; the addict requires an “ever larger” dose to feel the same level of short-term satisfaction. This leads to the search for more and more extreme sexual stimulation, often including extreme sexual pleasures that may be illegal, including frequent masturbation regardless of place and circumstance.

People who suffer from sexual addiction rarely acknowledge the existence of a problem, and dependence becomes evident when significant harm is already caused (physical, social or emotional). However, it is extremely important to tackle the problem as soon as possible in order to prevent the bigger damage. The best way out is to look for experts who will provide a professional and personal approach to your problem and help you find a way to a new life.

Sex Addiction Issue

The therapy is usually based on certain antidepressants, which restore the balance of the nervous system, responsible for monitoring sexual impulses. In addition, addicts need a psychologist to help them cope with the existing complexes, feelings of inferiority, and emptiness.

You can start controlling your desires only after getting rid of fear or a complex that has formed in the past. It is necessary to analyze the reason for the constant desire for sex and the demand for unusual caresses or other unnatural ways of satisfying oneself. It is also important to learn how to establish personal contacts without having sex.

However, perhaps some do not need any treatment in case of sexual addiction. They do not want it. They just like to live like this, and we do not have the right to condemn their free choice, especially if they are happy.

Some time ago, the public was impressed by the case of the famous actor David Duchovny, the “X-Files” series former main character. His wife, the actress Tea Leoni, was tired of his constant cheating and decided to break up, apparently not fully understanding the true nature of her husband's behavior. But, in order to preserve the marriage and his own image, he claimed that it was due to a disease! He voluntarily went to undergo a full course of treatment against sexual addiction.