For many guys, this issue is painful. You are a good guy, generous, smart, handsome, you earn money, and so on. But you have no luck in personal life. Girls don’t want a relationship with you – they only see a friend in you. And it’s only half of the issue. It happens that a guy doesn’t even know that he is in the friend zone. He still courts a nice girl, but she thinks they are just friends. Why does this happen? What’s wrong with the guys? Why do girls consider potential boyfriends just friends? Let’s deal with these issues together.
Not many guys know what the friend zone is. We can explain it to you. If you get into this zone, a girl perceives you as a friend, although she understands perfectly well that you are counting on much more. Such relationships can suit a girl for various reasons, but, of course, absolutely not suit you!
It is believed that a person evaluates another person during the first minutes of dating. Their eyes meet, they exchange a couple of phrases, and it become more or less clear whether they like each other or not. Everything is almost the same if we are talking about a love relationship. But one thing is that there appears a spark between a man and a woman. So, what are the reasons for becoming just friends?
1. A girl doesn’t want a guy, doesn’t want intimacy with him
And this is the first reason. If a girl looks at a guy and she doesn’t have a desire for intimacy with him, then a guy goes to the friend zone. Immediately. No matter what a girl says.
2. A guy is not interesting for a girl
One more reason for sending a guy to the friend zone may be the fact that a girl just feels bored with him. It happens if a girl thinks a guy is boring, obsessed with his hobbies and if they just don’t have anything to talk about. A guy just can’t switch the girl’s attention to himself and therefore every conversation is reduced to discussing exes or some other stupid topics. Such relationships are doomed.
3. Any girl will not look at a spineless guy
An older woman can do this. Young people need a drama in a relationship. And hence the stereotype: the less a man loves and appreciates a girl, the more she likes him. This is particularly about young ladies. Older women prioritize differently. So, a guy spends too much time communicating with a girl, forgets about his work, postpones meetings with friends, and ceases to develop. He becomes an admirer, is always with a girl, wants to please her constantly, is afraid to say the wrong word and cause her displeasure, and always agrees with her opinion. And all is for her! He loves without any hope of reciprocity. But a girl just ignores all these signs of attention.
4. A girl doesn’t like how a guy looks and smells
If a girl doesn’t like the appearance or smell of a guy, then he can’t even dream of this girl. Most likely she will not tell him this directly. It is necessary to guess only. And in general, if you want a girl to like you, then you have to start watching yourself. Don’t think that a woman is just waiting for such a poor fellow to work with him on his shortcomings. It is a myth. A guy has to begin work on his mistakes by himself.
5. The material condition of a guy
In our time, many girls look for benefits everywhere. They are literally ready to do anything for an expensive thing. It’s better not to fall in love with such a girl. She doesn’t care about the inner world of a guy, his love, and care. However, if you look at the other side, then you can justify a woman. She just wants to secure herself and her future children, so she aspires to protect her life as much as possible. Choosing a rich and respectable man, she deprives herself of the opportunity to love. What can a woman give her children and her husband if she blocks love in her? She will live with her unloved man all her life and give birth to his children. And no wealth will smooth this pain.
So, the most frequent reason for becoming friends and not lovers is the wrong behavior of a guy towards a girl. He initially behaves like a friend, and not like a potential boyfriend. A girl can only fall in love with a real man, a real leader who leads her along. She needs to see a manhood and independence in the chosen one in order to love him. But she can’t fall in love with someone who shows addicted behavior.
There may be several reasons for which a girl keeps you at a distance for many months and even years, but they are united by the main thing – the benefit. Here are the most common:
If you get acquainted with a girl, start to show signs of attention from the very beginning. Try to take her hand, hug or kiss when you’re alone. If all has ended unsuccessfully, then you are just friends. If a guy often becomes a friend for girls, then it’s time to think about it. It’s time to change something. It means that something is wrong with this guy. That’s why there is the opinion among women that a married man is better than a bachelor. It’s like natural selection. Women feel something.
One of the most frequently asked questions is how to prevent or get out of the hated friend zone. There is no magic pill that can help escape from it, but there are a lot of factors that can help avoid this terrible word. The most important thing is emotions. What is love? This is emotions! Delight, joy, embarrassment, shock (pleasant), intrigue, jealousy, and many other positive (and not so positive) emotions are the main component of the foundation of any relationship between a man and a woman. If you can play with feelings, you will be able to get any girl. Let’s take a closer look:
1. Start with changing your personality
When you make attempts to start getting out of the hated friend zone, try to become more romantic, talk more often with her about your feelings, and show her your passion in every possible way. In a word, start behaving with her not as a friend but as a hot lover. In this situation, she will have to make a choice – either to answer your feelings or stop fooling your head and end a relationship.
2. Try to tame her
Slowly and gradually reduce the distance between you. At every opportunity, embrace her around the waist, and kiss her not on the cheek but more intimately – on the neck or shoulders. If she likes you at least a little, she just will not be able to keep a long defense.
3. Put her in her place
Stop pandering to all her whims if your goal is to escape the friend zone and start a relationship. Show that you have a character (girls like guys with a strong character). Tactfully, but firmly demonstrate to her that you respect yourself, value your time, and don’t intend to spend it on fulfilling all of her selfish desires.
4. Reduce the time of communication
Maybe she doesn’t appreciate you because she’s just too used to your constant presence and even thinks that you can’t suddenly disappear from her life. Try not to go out with her as often as before. Disappear under any pretext for a week or two. Perhaps she will begin to miss you. And even if a weak spark of liking for you flickers in her heart, then her feelings have every chance to flare up with a bright flame of love.
5. Unobtrusively show her all your best masculine qualities
Show courage, determination, willingness to help, and so on. Let her have at least one reason to admire you. Behave with her not as with a friend, but as with a real woman. Don’t be afraid and don’t hesitate to show her that you want her, that you are jealous of her and that you don’t agree to play with her as one of her friends. Flirt with her, take care of her, but she should feel and understand that your patience is not unlimited, and that if she continues to play the game of friendship, she risks losing you forever! In a word, less shyness and more determination and self-confidence!
6. Don’t ask for an opinion on any occasion
If you have already found the object of your adoration, you shouldn’t always ask for advice or recommendations from your passion: what film to watch, what to wear, where to go, what to give, etc. And when you want to see her, just invite her to the cinema or arrange a date, and don’t ask her whether she wants to spend time with you. Just act.
7. Do something unexpected
Few people don’t like surprises. If the object of your admiration is a young girl, you can meet her after her classes and give flowers, for example. It is simple. But don’t demand anything in return. Guys, remember that avoiding the friend zone, it is important not to make a relationship the goal of your life. Communicate and show your good attitude to this person and, perhaps, she will appreciate it.
8. Make her jealous
You can find another best friend or even a girlfriend. Thus, you cause mixed feelings in the subject of your adoration. Often in such situations, this serves as an additional impetus for a girl to determine her feelings.
9. Be near
If you are going to get out of the hated friend zone, then casually, as if by chance, offer support, take care at the right time, be ready to listen, etc. Let her understand that she can rely on you not only when she wants to go somewhere or ask you to do a favor.
10. If you see that all this is in vain, then just leave her
You almost had a plan of the friend zone escape, but you noticed that she didn’t have any reciprocal feelings for you. All people are different and there should be chemistry between a man and a woman. If this doesn’t happen, then it’s not yours. Forget her and go on.
Sometimes it is even better to be friends with a girl than to start a relationship with her. Being friends, she can behave nice, but as soon as you get close, a dramatic change can happen and you may not be very happy about it. There are a lot of free girls around that just want you to take the initiative. Many of them are much better than the one you consider the love of your life. Throw out of your head all unnecessary things and the phrase “She is the dream of my whole life, how can I turn our friendship into a relationship with her?” Just do what you think is necessary and if she is really “yours”, then she will not go away from you anywhere.