Online Dating Tips for Shy Guys

Some of us are not as self-confident when it comes to dating as others. Some of us face lots of issues when it comes to communication with women for one reason or another, this rather simple act of just talking to a girl seems impossible to so many men, young and old, brash, and wise. But why is it the case? Can this issue be solved? Is there an alternative that is suitable for shy guys? Today we will talk about online dating as a viable alternative to meeting single ladies for dating in real life.

dating apps for shy guys

Is Online Dating Good for Shy Guys?

Dating sites can be a great chance to find a girlfriend. One of the advantages of such sites is that the girls with whom you will chat are free, they are also looking for relationships. The difficulty is to find someone who will like you.

  • Do not be discouraged by failure. Remember, the sea is full of other fish.
  • Register on several dating sites.
  • Be honest when telling who you are and what you want.

Do Women Like Shy Guys: Turn Your Flaws into Advantages

Do women like shy guys? Well, this question is quite hard to answer as all women are different. If you have done any research on this issue and you’ve been talking to some people that think that they are “experts” on this matter, you have probably heard things like “women only get attracted to self-confident guys that are strong-willed and successful.” Well, all of these traits are certainly appealing to women, but this doesn’t mean that nothing else will work. Let’s talk about some of the traits that women looking for men may be looking for.

You're a good listener

Shy people dating can be quite hard at times, but there are some advantages that you possess, one of such advantages is your ability to listen. You are a shy person, and you are probably a bit afraid to talk about yourself in detail. I suppose that you are generally very brief and shy when it comes to telling stories about yourself. You, also, want to please a woman, and thus, it will be easier for you to listen to the things she has to say.

You know how to spend time with pleasure

Dating shy guys is not boring. Some people think that introverted people can’t just have a great time doing the things they like, as they associate all the fun stuff with social interactions. This is a very foolish opinion, and it holds no merit in reality. The world is filled with all sorts of various activities and great ways of spending some quality time with someone else. It’s not just about video and tabletop games but the simplest of things like watching movies together, reading comics, listening to music, painting, etc.

You are interested in communication

Yeah, it will be a bit harder for you to fully express yourself in comparison to an extroverted person that has a lot of experience talking to other people, especially those of the opposite gender. But this doesn’t mean that you have nothing to talk about, you are interested in a lot of fascinating things, which may not be all that exciting to you in the context of sharing them with someone else, but you have to realize the way in which your world collides with the world of another person. This is what’s important.

You are cute and kind

Let’s face it, you are not a macho, and it is quite likely that you don’t want to be one. And this is yet another thing that will attract a lot of women. There are a lot of things to hate about a macho and lots of women nowadays despise men that just can’t seem to keep themselves together near a girl. Machos are too obsessive, they are too selfish, and they always want to get laid.

Online Dating Tips for Shy Guys

Now when you know that there are quite a lot of things a woman can find appealing about a guy like you, let’s talk about some important things you should know about online dating that will come in handy in your dating experience. Can shy guys and dating coexist? They surely can, yet you just need to be aware of some things about dating that will help you out in the future. Here are some dating tips for shy guys.

Develop your sense of humor

If you were not given a sense of humor from nature, work on it! Humor helps relax in a tense situation. If you are not good at jokes, try to develop a sense of humor in yourself, then you will have the opportunity to use it in different awkward situations.Try to work it out on yourself.

  • flirting tips for shy guysSituational humor is humor thanks to which you can get out of an awkward situation and pay attention to its absurdity.
  • Being able to laugh at yourself is an incredibly useful thing, especially if you are confident in yourself. If you doubt yourself and are afraid to get nervous, it is better not to resort to humor.
  • Do not get carried away with dirty jokes, do not joke about religion and politics, about other people. This sense of humor may not be appreciated, and you will seem rude and vile.

Learn to communicate with girls in a friendly tone

How to not be shy around a girl? You need to gain experience in dealing with girls, even if you remain just friends. Make friends with one of the girls to just chat and be friends. Have fun, spend time together, get acquainted. You need to understand how girls think, how they act, how their behavior differs from guys.

Try not to seem nervous or indecisive

How to talk to girls if you are shy? When looking for a girl, try to be confident and not nervous. Otherwise, the girls will feel your insecurity, and this can push them away. Besides, the guys who always stare at the girls and show too much attention to the point will never look great in the eyes of women.

Make yourself start a conversation with a girl

When you try to become more sociable and find a girl, do not back down because of your shyness! You have to force yourself to talk to as many girls as possible. This will help you not only hone your communication skills but also meet with many different girls. Soon you will realize that shyness is a thing of the past!

While you are alone, try to communicate with girls as often as possible

Perhaps because of your shyness, you convinced yourself that now you do not need it for one reason or another. But this is a trap because while you are not dating anyone, your communication and flirting skills may gradually deteriorate, and your shyness may become stronger. So try to communicate with every girl that you like.

  • Do not be discouraged if you get rejected.
  • Try to arrange at least a couple of dates per month.
  • Try not to date several girls at the same time. Of course, it’s perfectly normal to schedule a couple of dates a month, but if you invite a girl to a second or third date, it’s better to stay with this girl and not meet with others until you are ready for a new relationship.

Do not look for the “perfect” girl

Here’s yet another important thing to remember about dating for shy people. Due to our shyness, we come up with an excuse for ourselves as to why we do not communicate, for example, we do not date girls just because we have not met the “ideal girl” yet, who is good enough for us. This is a bad excuse. You will not understand what advantages and disadvantages a person has until you talk to them and get to know them better (this may take several dates).

  • Therefore, communicate and meet with the maximum number of girls.
  • Do not let the idea of "perfection" prevent you from getting to know a girl and then flirting with her.
  • Believe me, you will not be able to truly get to know a person until you spend some time with them.

Now it’s time for some action, you can’t just be dating a girl online for the rest of your life, you have to arrange a date with her.

Invite her on a date

The best way to overcome shyness and find a girl is to simply invite her on a date. Everything else will simply not do. So, here are some examples of how should one do it.

  • Tell her that you want to invite her for a cup of coffee or lunch to get to know her better.
  • Arrange a first date where you can talk and get to know each other better. For example, you can go for a coffee or have a picnic in the park.
  • Try to ask her out as early as possible. If you won’t do it in time, you may end up becoming her friend and nothing more.

Call her the day after a date

Be sure to call her either the next day or the same day but in the evening. This conversation is key to taking your relationship to the next level. Besides, this is an opportunity to invite her out again. So what you need to do:

  • Text her after a date and thank her for spending some quality time together.
  • Compliment her and say that it was nice spending time with her.
  • Tell her that you would like to meet again.
  • Arrange a second date.
  • Do not write or call her immediately after a date (unless she texts first, or if you did not agree on this in advance). You do not want to seem too intrusive.

At the second date, try to get to know each other better

The second date should be easier because you have already learned a little about each other. On the second date, you should enjoy each other's company, continuing to talk about yourself and learn some important things about a girl. Remember that communication is the best way to move your relationship forward.

  • On a second date, you can invite her for dinner or see a movie (not just to the movies!). You can continue to get to know each other at lunch or dinner and then watch a movie together.
  • Take a walk around the city. You can walk to beautiful places (on foot or by car), this is a good way to spend time together and share experiences.
  • Try not to rush your relationships too much. It’s not very tactful of you to invite her to watch something too intimate and explicit.
  • The third date should be similar to the second, but a little more intimate.

Communicate when you are not together

After a few dates, if your relationship develops normally, most likely, you will start dating. This does not mean that you should be in touch with her on every single minute of the day, but doing so from time to time will be quite enough.

  • Make sure that the girl also supports communication.
  • If you want to be with her, always answer her phone calls and text messages.
  • Try to build a deeper and stronger bond and trust, based on this communication.

Continue to keep in touch while you meet

How to find a girlfriend if you're shy? Play by your own rules, continue to improve, try to get rid of shyness, work on self-confidence and continue to communicate with girls until you enter into a relationship and are satisfied with yourself. In the end, this is one of your main goals. Do not give up!

Some Other Important Tips for Dating

  • Do not give the girl too many compliments. Praising a girl is a good thing, but if you do it too often, she might find it strange or obsessive.
  • Do not tell your friends her secrets and other personal information that she shares with you. If she wanted to tell one of her friends about this, she would share this information with them, and not with you. So try to keep secret what she tells you.
  • Do not express yourself to her if you are not sure that she will perceive it normally.
  • Be honest and sincere with her. Girls appreciate sincerity when you tell them about your feelings.
  • Remember that guys do not have to look like Brad Pitt to start dating a girl. Do not consider yourself a freak, pay attention to the guys of other attractive girls, and you will understand that none of them are perfect.
  • You are beautiful in your own right. It is you, not someone else.
  • Remember that girls show their sympathy pretty quickly. If it seems to you that a girl just doesn’t seem to be interested in you, then just move on.
  • Do not overdo it with flirting. Girls may not like this.

how to talk to girls if you are shyDating Sites for Shy Guys

Now that we are done with flirting tips for shy guys, here are some dating sites for shy guys.


Let’s talk about the best dating site for shy guys one can find online. It’s, and it has developed a great reputation as a reliable and efficient site for every person that wants to find a partner in this life. This is a great dating site for shy guys.

2. SingleAndShy

While the community of SingleAndShy is quite small, standing at just around 2000 people, it means that you won’t encounter any bots or scam artists there. It is a small community that is open to all newcomers.

3. Shyonlinedating

Shyonlinedating gives you the ability to start dating other people without uploading a photo, well, at least at first. You will be able to reveal more information about yourself as the time goes on and you feel more comfortable with talking to your partner.

4. PlentyOfFish

Now it is one of the most intriguing dating apps for shy guys. The main thing about POS is the chemistry test. It analyzes your personality and then gives you a list of people that matched your personality. This is certainly a great way to unite two lonely shy souls.

5. Datemyschool

This site only accepts undergraduates and graduates, you have to verify your personal information to start dating women on the service. It certainly makes the service quite safe from all the potential scammers and bots that plague even the most popular of online dating services.

As you can see, online dating is a viable option to everyone, especially those that feel a little shy and anxious when it comes to real-life communication. There are, however, quite a lot of things to consider, first, you have to realize that there are quite a lot of things to like about a shy guy. Yet you should not just relax and feel like you’ve got it on lock, you still have a lot of work to do.

Comments (1)
I’ve been very humble since childhood. Therefore, I’ve always experienced problems in communicating and building relationships with the fair sex. I hope your advice will help me.
13.03.2020 16:32
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